Salam to everyone.

All my successes had been built on my failures – Benjamin Disraeli

Days gone by. I came to realize that May is almost at it’s end. By starting off mumbling regarding what had happened to me in the past few weeks is plain boring. Let the quote above reflects something out about ourselves. I have something else in mind.

Alhamdulillah business had been tremendously good. I can’t thank Allah enough, for His endless bless, His guidance and rahmat. Alhamdulillah. Rough patches arose every now and then but the power of tawakal had been doing it’s magic. Beyond any available prowess made achievable by men, somehow we slipped. Sometimes we forgot. But we can’t put Him aside. Trust me. He scrutinizes every un-uttered lines, every whispers in our little hearts.

For this perfect fates, I thank Him. For this gracious bliss, I thank Him. I can get very misty-eyed whenever I brought this subject up. I guess Maher Zain’s Thank you Allah will somehow describe my soul as per se.

Countless ni’mat, how should I express those in words. His gifts had never failed to surprise me. At times I thought I needed my friends to support my downs, they were not here. And I don’t blame them either, I hadn’t been there for them all the time as well. At times I thought I would cut off some ties over something which happened to be what matters most to me at the moment, Allah lose them all for good. My life had been miraculously happier without them around. Strange, but true. We just need to view it as a third party, insyaAllah, without hesitation, we’ll know what’s good and better Allah had in store for us.

I am forever seeking His bless. May WE ALL forever be under His bless.

Has He counts my thanks in? I never think it will be enough.

I’ll be posting some good news, insyaAllah, very very soon.

Best regards.

If I can freely  put into words what I have in mind right now,  this is going to be another long and (as always) very boring post.

Salam to everyone.

Weekends had been busy. Nothing unusual happened. MaulidurRasul (a day that marked Prophet Muhammad’s PBUH birthday) was celebrated on Friday; while in while the world is still looking pretty much the same. The end of it is nearing, yet, they have no fear.  Or shall I say they’ve forgotten how to feel the ‘fear’. They recited selawat with great enthusiasm. But they neglected the rest of the Rukun Islam. They talked about how great His Prophet was in leading the ummah, how undeniably courageous and  soft  He was in person. But they still don’t  listen to rakyat. As a matter of fact, our rights were denied, especially when poor people were concerned. They faked the empathy. Sad. But it’s true.

I never compromise hypocrisy. I never do.

By telling my heart out won’t do the justice. I did not come from a filthy rich family. But we’ve been fine. Thanks to Allah’s endless rahmat, we managed, by far, to live the life everybody’s envy of (literally speaking). I pulled the strength (thanks to Allah again), persevering my way through any obstacles, toughening myself while in while keeping up with endless challenges that come along the way. I don’t think I will give up that easily now.

I know and HE knows how hard I’ve worked.

I know and HE knows how badly I wanted this business to succeed.

I know and HE knows what I had had for dinners for the past 18 months.

HE knows. And HE had been with me all along.

I might get a little emotional now.

Oh my~

I don’t ask them to play God. I just hate their fake smiles.

As I’ve mentioned above, I never compromise hypocrisy.

When I was hesitating to jump into the water [starting off my business], no one cares. No one was there to teach me how to swim [piece of advice]. No one was there to watch my back [courageous words]. No one was there to offer me a float [funds and capital]. Most of them were discouraging me to swim [ laugh behind my back].

But the great Muhammad PBUH had leaved a very good track of entrepreneurial skills and knowledge.

And Allah had clearly described the power of tawakal. Plus how much HE mentioned how HE loves hamba-hambaNya yang bekerja keras.

And so I jumped.

Then I got almost drowned [ setback ], swallowed a lot of water [obstacles], I cried for help [ I mean, real help]. But no one come to my rescue [ I was downgraded, misjudged and manipulated].

But then again,  Muhammad PBUH the prophet had thought the ummah the meaning of patience and perseverance. And ALLAH had promised handsome rewards for those who did.

And so I swam further. From dog paddling to butterfly stroke, I can even now dream of winning an Olympic medal!

Thanks to my Creator and His beloved prophet. Thanks to dear family and friends.

But thanks not to them.

Again, I never compromise hypocrisy.

This is the wrong time for you to show up with your yacht or even a banana boat and offer me a ride.

So, so wrong.

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“Oh Lord, lead us to the correct path. And bless Your endless love upon Muhammad PBUH. May His spirit will shine in us all. Amin.”

Salam to all.

Time has flown so fast, I can hardly catch my breath.

When they said welcome to the world of business, it means welcome to weeks without a day off. Fast foods. Headache. Sleepless nights. And gaining a few extra kilos when you least expecting it.  They were not lying.

When they said making big bucks was the main purpose, it means you need to burn a big hole in your pocket before you can earn more. Lose some. Earn some. Betrayed. Cheated. Manipulated. I’ve gone through some. It was never easy as it sounds. And they were not lying.

When they said entrepreneurs will reach a serious profitibilty after seven years of starting off a business, don’t lose your preseverence. Fight your lust and delay any sort of instant gratification. New cars. Expensive handphones. Latest gadgets. Forget it. Don’t break the law. They were seriously not lying.

When they say I am too young for this business, they were not lying. And that will only make me stronger, in some ways. Regardless how I feel right now.

Obstacles will make or break you. It’s about time to grow up. And I am not lying.

Yes, right. What’s my age again?

Salam and a great, great hello to everyone.

I’ve been in a great spirit. Regarding on one big project I’ve mentioned in the previous post, I managed to pull it through with an awful lot of difficulties. But first, sembah takzim dan tahniah buat Ke Bawah Duli Yang Maha Mulia, Tuanku Muhriz ibni Almarhum Tuanku Munawir upon His Highness installation as the 11th Yamtuan of Negri Sembilan. As a Negri native, I felt extremely proud and grateful Daulat Tuanku!!

As how anyone would put it, success never come overnight. Lucky is not accidental. And failure is not an option.

I’ve decided to choose victory, despite the dear price that I have to pay. Failures came and went as they pleased but I looked up at them as opportunities to learn something new. I might be very much inexperienced (as how some of my lecturers put it), I might as well learned everything the hard way. But I know, somehow, I’ve made my mind. I know what I want and where I am heading.

(Mr. XX, thank you for the irresistible offer, but no, I don’t want to be a pastry chef~)

There’s a long way to go, though.

But Alhamdulillah. Patience pays it’s price. Everytime I come to think about it, I wished I could do a little bit better, a little bit faster, a little bit nicer; a little bit more of everything. But nope, Allah had wrote my path according to His plan. The timing is just perfect. Just perfect.

With so many dreams in one hand and tireless effort in the other, growing up with supportive family and friends is a huge rahmat. I might weep and smile all at the same time, but for those who know me better, I wouldn’t be able to stand this tall without their support. Unintentionally done, I might forget an awful lot of birthdays, missed a handful of gatherings, weddings and God-knows what else, but please remember one thing; I never missed praying for everybody’s good health and prosperous life, every single day.

I know this journey might ruin a few bonds.

And I couldn’t do anything about it.

To those who understood, thank you.

*****************************************************************************

One of my 100-things-to-do-before-I-die-list had come true.

#17 Serve my cake to a King.

It’s been a great year.

Even I’ve accomplished #5 Watch MU plays in front of my bare eyes. And a few more of #’s [ of which I couldn't spare the details, yet ]. But anyhow, all praises to Allah for this bless. Alhamdulillah..

Till then, have faith in yourself. Do whatever it takes to achieve your dreams. Impossible is indeed, nothing. You need to stumble before you can run.

Best regards

p/s : A huge thanks to Tengku Tina of Istana Besar Seri Menanti for making one of my biggest dream come true. To my dear friends; Aini, Along, Syikin, Fifa and Nadiah, what would I be without you guys. Last but not least, Kak Lin, for all those encouraging words. Thanks a lot.

Honoured : With YAM Tunku Ali Redhauddin ibni Tuanku Muhriz and friends.

I fell in love all over again with Sami Yusuf.

I can’t remember when was the last time I cry profusely. But this beautifully composed song by him, Try Not To Cry, was by far, the most touching song I’ve ever heard after NowSeeHeart’s Damai Yang Hilang.

The feeling of helplessness engulfed me all night, with the views of innocent children of Palestine suffered from a sin they never made, keep on replaying in my head.

Were we being grateful enough towards all the blessings HE had showered? Or had HIS rahmat only drove us blindly to fulfill one’s desire, thus amounting countless mistakes and errors in life?

Hmm, a little boy shot in the head
Just another kid sent out to get some bread
Not the first murder nor the last
Again and again a repetition of the past
Since the very first day same story
Young ones, old ones, some glory
How can it be, has the whole world turned blind?
Or is it just ’cause it’s only affecting my kind?!
If these walls could speak,
imagine what would they say
For me in this path that I walk on
there’s only one way
Bullets may kill, bones may break
Still I throw stones like David before

I will try not to cry. Pray hard the suffering will be soon over. Pray hard.

I had no idea what I had turn myself into. Isolation had played it’s trick, or maybe it’s magic. By saying so, I admitted that living alone is never a good idea after all. Often by thinking back, again and again and again, I wish I could just move back to KL anyway.

But it won’t possibly solve my problems ( I know I’ve created some unnecessary ones), but all in all, I need some companions. Although people can joke around and I can gladly give my smirk upon their remark on why I should get married by now, I took it as a personal insult.

Yes, they can play cupid. Some single lecturers in the college, some gorgeous doctors in the hospital, and then what’s next? ” Hey, my name is Munirah, single and available. When do you possibly think we can tie the knot?” Nah. That’s just plain great.

My lifestyle back in the city was not that perfect either. By becoming a loyal customer at a mamak restaurant back then, I got so used to menapau, and my skill at doing so is becoming more flawless nowadays. Socializing had been quite a challenge. Simple reason such as “I’m seriously busy” is just another, well, reason. Although I enjoy outdoor activities just as much as I enjoy napping in the afternoon, dragging myself out of my house in the evening is impossible. I couldn’t answer anymore, “Mak dengan ayah tak balik ke?” question. Nor that I can stand the view of housewives in kain batik, standing by the road, chatting gleefully while laughing. And, I can’t stand anymore stupid gestures from some pervert guys in town.

Is my life that miserable?

Looking at the bright side of everything, well, I’m about to turn 23. And yes, the question of “When will you get married?” surely bombarded any working females out there too. “When ayah and mak are coming back home?”, for one obvious fact, hey, these strangers know my parents, and they know me too (surprise, surprise!). Being well-known to a group of strangers can be quite spooky but who cares. I should feel good about that, I guess.

Tapau? I better eat for one rather than polishing up my cooking skill which end up wasting. In fact, I am good at cooking my own meal so why bother? Gossiping housewives? I better think twice about my future would look like too~

And yes, pervert men are everywhere. By moving back to KL won’t solve the problem. At least we don’t have that much of immigrants, here, in Kuala Pilah.

What do I do now?

Being an optimistic is easier said than done. But it can be achieved. At least, I am my own boss. I can wake up at any time I want, without worrying over my punch card’s timeline. I have my cats to listen to my nag and my neighbours who are concerned about me. I don’t have to do a wardrobe makeover every now and then, I am more than comfortable in my old pair of jeans and sneakers. And yes, I did meet a lot of gorgeous, young, hot doctors in the hospital everyday.

Feeling lucky?

I did!

Thank you Allah for this bless

Salam to all.

To my delightful surprise, mak and ayah arrived home from Kangar last Saturday. As how my sister and I had already planned and bought to&fro tickets to visit them on this coming 23rd, mak suddenly had to attend a seminar in Serdang which started tomorrow. There, our miss-you-like-crazy-sickness has been healed quicker than we thought  All in all, I was thrilled. Just to have their presence back in home was already a very huge gift, given by Him, at the time where I did want them to be around the most~

Whenever I had to fight over my not-so-perfect senses with my feelings, I went dumb.. and numb. As how I would put it, I AM NOT YET AN ADULT. Sometimes I can handle things as diligently as any 22 year old should have done. But most of the times, probably due to a lot of surrounding stress and peer pressure, I did feel like decision-making is my worst nightmare ever. As an entrepreneur, a leader of the organization, a daughter who has to take charge of her life by her own, this is not good; at all.

I envied my cousin, for he is only 21, and yet he has the ability to console and walk me out of those clouds that engulfed my sight. Genetically, he entitled the privilege of making wise decisions with little effort. As a matter of fact, whenever I was worrying sick regarding any unsolved problem I’ve encountered, he’d be among the first few persons I would contact and pour my heart out. Sounded a little too selfish or having a low self-esteem whatsoever, you name it, I wouldn’t put it that way. As how my friend qouted, a human being is born with different flaws and abilities. While you could be great at something, you MUST have another trait that’s lacking. I admitted that I need a second say in most of my decision-making situations. Trust me at this one thing. When you started to feel very weak and helpless, always, ALWAYS remember that it is absolutely NORMAL. We are all weak, at various different points and levels. And if seeking help will make you feel better, find a person who can give you all the support that you required at that particular moment. While it can be very less daunting, as you go along the prosses, you will eventually realize that you had cut down all the unnecessary worries and sickness just by talking about it over with someone else.

It is totally not sellfish. We’re not perfect. Nor that we are good enough for not taking different point of views of other people who cared greatly about us. Just remember to watch over our limitations and boundaries and grow up along the way!

And as how I will like to stress out, always remember HIM.

If ALLAH brings you to it, HE will bring you through it;

Happy moments, praise ALLAH;

Difficult moments, seek ALLAH;

Quiet moments, worship ALLAH;

Painful moments, trust ALLAH;

Every moment, thank ALLAH

Best regards

Salam everyone.

It’s one of these days where my brain had drained out; wondering about a lot of things, neglecting the necessities or not. Whether my mind was doing me tricks by sending blurry signals about what was happening around me or it’s just another fact that I have to learn to willingly accept, I’m not quite sure.

My bluecube hadn’t being so co-operative since last week. After numerous calls to celcom center then only we had everything in order again. Thanked God. Had some catching up with my old lecturer (asking for a new theme for www.sitimunirah.com), read the latest news on MU’s new sign-ups ( Michael Owen? for real?), updating my status at facebook (www.facebook.com/sitimunirahs) and the list goes on. Sangat berfaedah internet ni kan?

As for the activities last week, I drove myself to Shah Alam for a wedding cake delivery for Kak Aziriah  (first time!), met up my precious cousins in Subang, got lost in PJ (ended up somewhere near Sri Petaling! lorh!), attended an Irfan Khairi’s pre-seminar at Cititel ( ini sangat best!, I even gave him a loaf of cake and had him autographed my book! ^_^), and also, enjoying late night dinner ( just like the old days back in PJ). How I missed those times

The next day itself, as I and Arry made our way heading home, boleh pulak tayar pancit, in the middle of Federal Highway!

Nah.

That’s interesting!

As how my super GIRLPOWER spirit skyrocketting, we vowed to take care of the issue by ourselves. Of course, my big brother had been giving instructions on hows and to-dos. The thing is, first, I’ve never change a flat tyre. Second, Arry also never change a flat tyre (haha). Third, I had always been the ‘macho’ kind of person, so, I do prefer to do everything on my own (lagi laa). Fourth, although we were wearing the ‘kesian‘ faces, nobody was really keen on helping us, probably because it was 7.45am, they were all rushing to punch their cards on time, aite?

So that’s it. Living in a busy city required a higher level of surviving. And so we did changed the tyre with some help from a few good samaritans and the rest was history. I managed to get everything done in less then 20 minutes. Not a good record but at least, I do know how to now :)

As how fate has it, we made a safe journey home. By that evening, Arry and I walloping on a guni of durians from my kampung. It was a very interesting weekend and the next thing I know, I was down with fever on Sunday

Anyway and anyhow, a few habits-changing-challenge will be taking place all this week. A lot of things in mind, which I would love to keep them to myself at the moment, figuring how to work everything out in compose. A lot of thanks to Dr Irfan for the short and resourceful seminar. A deepest gratitude goes to my cousin for being here when I needed him the most. A grateful wish to dear God for some eye-opening scenarios, heart-warming moments, and endless nikmat. Jazakallah.

And last but not least, here goes a Turkish proverb, which was sent by Uncle Aziz (thanks!) via email :

A fool dreams of wealth, a wise man, of happiness

p/s : 11 more days for MU to come over to Bukit Jalil! I can’t hardly wait

An emergency cake, I had to get it done in the middle of finishing a wedding cake ~

Kek hantaran buat Kak Aziriah, Shah Alam. Tahniah

Pandangan dari hadapan kek

And, guess who’s this….

Ladies & gentlemen, presenting the ever humble Dr. Irfan Khairi

Ok, got to go now. I want to ‘dream’ of happiness. Best regards

Salam and a great hello

It’s been a while since my last post. A string of errands kept my hands literally off writing, although I have a lot of things in mind.

A 4-day seminar I had last week was great. Besides being able to meet a lot of new friends, we were exposed to the real situation of the business world which is neither smooth-flowing nor merciful. Huh. I didn’t mean to make it sound very difficult, but the truth is there. Having a heart as cold as an ice, being brave and bold are just a few of other necessities needed in an entrepreneur, maybe.. And I am nowhere near that after all. Not yet.

But, anyway, here goes some interesting facts:

• a 28 yo female entrepreneur made RM250 000 in sales for these past 5 months, selling mee kuning, alone;
• a 40 yo male businessman made RM1.3 million in sales per month by manufacturing and selling kerepek ubi;
• a male friend who made RM 12 000 per month by working for a factory, quitted his job and started a cookie-making business in a large scale;

And on top of that, these are successful Muslim entrepreneurs who dreamt big and achieve what they hearts desire.

God, You know what’s mine

p/s : missing mak and ayah terribly.. can’t wait to go up north

Salam and a very great hello to everyone

Have you ever wonder how difficult it is to take care of a single person? Expenses and concern and care? Enduring love, patience and hard work? Have you ever tried to spend you hard-earned money for someone you cared ever greatly, without having a second thought of not-to? Please them despite their never-ending demands and likes and dislikes.. Neglecting your own pleasure and comfort for theirs?

Right. Good question. What’s my age again?

Sometimes I did feel I am ready, for whatever things that might come my way. I’ve skipped various obstacles, finding any possible way through the dark and the pain, let alone convincing myself that I am strong and undeniably patient, I can face any challenges in life. But that’s not the whole story is all about.

Take a great look to what’s happening around. People at my age are eager throwing themselves into this one big hole called ‘leisure & fun’. They had great times, searching for their own ‘definition’ of ‘life’. Sometimes it makes me sick to the very bone, realizing somehow, this whole picture is just not right. This is not I want the people of my race look like. No. A big NO. Taking up a responsibility is no longer an accomplishment of a person’s potential. It’s something that can be postponed, let alone be forgotten. All that we know is that our parents can provide us with all the money in the world we desired. It’s OK not to have ambition, it’s OK not to have a steady job; I can join AF and become a big star, I can marry one big-shot and living my life lavishly without the slightest thought of worry, my uncle is a YB, he should help me out with any projects..

Reality. Checked. And yes, it hurts..

Pledging won’t do the trick. I can write a lenghty sick of a post, but it’s going nowhere. I have no idea how to knock some senses back to their typical way of thinking, who there to be blamed or God-knows-what else. If only they know how difficult it is to take care of a family, how hard it is to earn a respectful living, how tedious and fussy it is to draw a happy smile on everybody’s face, how to be patient when your blood has reached it’s boiling point, how to say yes to a supposedly-no demand.. Gosh, live as an adult will never get easier.

I’m not spilling my heart out. It’s just a great concern and question : how well we’ve had ourselves prepared for life? And is it enough?

I completely understand that we learn as we get older. But are we ‘that’ eager to learn? To stumble and fall and willing to stand back straight in a nick of time? Ready to be corrected and matured?

I think I may need more time.

Although I am a fulltime guardian of my 2 younger sisters at the moment, I can’t help but wonder, am I ‘that’ ready for a bigger responsibility?

A commitment of a long-term relationship?

A trust that I can’t take for granted?

You tell me…

So to those ‘kiddos’ out there, have some mercy for yourself.

Life is definitely more than just some pretty faces, youth, and fun.

Trust me. I am in the middle of it.